Friday, November 1, 2013

Real Life on a Budget

This month I was asked to write the feature article for THYME magazine. What a honor! It is an inspiring online magazine written by women for women. I was asked to write about finances since we somehow make one salary work for our family :) So please check it out at www.thymemag.com. I will also post it below. Thanks for reading!  

Real Life on a Budget

One winter, a few years back, Central Texas had an unusually cold winter. We had days and days (and days) of below freezing weather. And, yes, even snow! Unheard of! Normally, I would have rejoiced at the opportunity to build a snowman, and drink hot cocoa all bundled up…and of course retreat at any time to a nice warm home.

However, this winter was different.

We had just recently moved to my husband’s first coaching career stop. It was our first home with our first baby, living on one salary, and residing in a very old country farmhouse with window units, no insulation, and exposed pipes. Now, I may sound like a snob to some, but window units and I do not get along. Especially in very cold days like these (I would have never survived before central heat and air!) I was continually cold that winter, and I was convinced my baby was, too.

One morning, after Cliff left for work, I forced myself out of my warm bed and headed for the shower, to wake up. As I turned on the faucet, nothing came out. No water.

“What, no water?”

After checking the rest of the house, I realized our pipes had frozen. Super! When our little one woke up, I bundled her up and headed to a friend’s house (a normal house with working water, central heat and air.) As I walked into her nice, warm home, I burst into tears. I was sick of being cold. I wanted a nice warm home like hers. And I began to wonder if the financial sacrifices we were making were really worth it.

We continued to live in that farmhouse for another year, even through another winter! And, guess what? We all survived! The bittersweet combination of back porch sunsets, grazing cattle, country insects crawling through the cracks in our home (that one was bitter), and star-filled nights left our lives more full, and our family more grateful and prepared for the adventure ahead.

Real life on a budget is hard.

We have to make sacrifices that other families aren’t making…or at least it seems that way, at times. We own used cars, most of our furniture is hand-me-downs or found at consignment stores, we eat at home a lot, and most of our clothes are birthday and Christmas gifts (thank you family!) Even though we have “upgraded” financially since our farmhouse stop, we are still budgeting, living on a high school coach’s salary, and making decisions that keep our finances healthy. Although it can be hard, I believe learning to live on a budget has grown me more into the person I want to be, desiring the things that really matter…like time with my children over the new couch and new table that would really make our home more comfortable. It has changed my perspective to wait for material things I think we need, or even save for them. And it’s funny how I much more appreciative I am, when we do buy them.

I still have days now where I struggle, when I lose perspective, and become discouraged or stressed about our finances. We have come into the habit (when my husband or I need fresh perspective) to schedule a family meeting (or a little chat after the kids go to bed) where we go over our concerns and prepare together for the path ahead. Through prayer, we plan where our money should and should not go. It helps us get on the same page, and even though we don’t always agree, it helps us gain new perspective on our priorities.

There are also times where we do not follow are budget as closely as we should. You’re thinking, “What? I thought you were perfectly disciplined!” Yes, we do splurge at times, but it looks different from when we were first married, using our credit cards like they were play money. Yes, we do go out and do fun things as a family, but we always reevaluate our budget to make sure we are staying on track.

It is amazing what we can live without, and how we can really thrive off of one salary. I couldn’t be more thankful to spend my days with my three little ones. As so many older and wiser women have told me, “These days go by fast.”

Although we still have a lot to learn, I thought I would share a few quick practical ways to tighten your budget:

Give. As a family we have always given. Both of our parents taught us to give, and even when it is not in our budget - we still give. We have given not just our money, but our things too, to those in need. I believe this has been the single most important discipline we have practiced and God has honored us beyond our expectations.

Get on the Same Page. As a couple, take a class, read a book or attend a seminar on finances to decide what your goals will be with your budget. Cliff and I took a Dave Ramsey seminar when we were first married, and it has dramatically helped us every step of the way.

Have an Emergency Fund. This is Dave Ramsey 101, but it has really helped us. Save up for an emergency fund, say around a thousand dollars, so when emergencies happen…car repairs, dog shots, carpet cleaning after you just finished potty training your toddler…you don’t have to take out of savings, or worse, put it on a credit card.

Pray for Extra Cushion. Pray and look for ways to make extra money, especially when kids’ birthday parties and Christmas start staring you in the face. God has always provided extra money or ways to make it when we have needed provision. I recently helped a family by watching their son, and my husband has had the opportunity to preach a few times on the weekends. These are awesome opportunities we enjoy that help provide that extra cushion each month.

Make Gifts. We rarely buy gifts, but still love blessing people. We are busy with three little ones, but we always find a way to put something special together for the ones we love. We paint rocks, make cookies for friends’ birthdays, decorate scripture cards for wedding and baby showers, print photos or a collage of our beautiful children (always a winner), or create many more God-inspired and found-on-Pinterest projects.

Make what you crave. So I am really talking about coffee here, but we also eat a lot of bread and sweets. I know, I need to read more about sugar discipline. However, invest in a latte machine, bread maker, or find a few homemade, yummy desert recipes, so you aren’t spending half of your paycheck at Starbucks or on Sonic milkshakes.

Ask Family to Help. We have an amazing family that has offered to help us even when we didn’t ask. If you need help with your son’s swim lessons or your daughter’s new dance outfit, ask your family. I am sure they would love to help. Just don’t ask every week. And don’t ask to move in with them, either. (Oh, wait…we tried that one.)

Living on a budget comes at a price, but the beauty it produces within us is far worth the sacrifice. I pray that God will lead us to make the best financial decisions for our family, and richly bless our home and life.  And that’s more than anything monetary can do!



Monday, August 19, 2013

Insta-Summer

Our life's documentation has moved to Instagram and Facebook, but I still hope to fit this blog in as well! So, I decided to provide an illustration of our summer through our Instagram photos and some videos. Cliff goes back to work, back to teaching/coaching this week (lots of tears), and I thought it would be a helpful to reflect on the wonderful summer God blessed us with (instead of sulk and cry that the fun is over!). Enjoy!

Flower Girl
Grace was a flower girl princess (Grace's title) for my cousins wedding. The style was so cute and Grace was precious. She was super excited as you can tell in the photos. She called Lauren, the bride, "the white girl princess." Haha!












 


Sea World

The first day Cliff was free in June, we took the whole family to Sea World. Teachers get in free and we didn't have to pay for Elijah and Anna Ruth. Cliff's mom came to help...which with three kiddos we needed it! It was an absolute blast, and I have to say that Shamu and the Sesame Street park were everyone's favorite.
































Camps
Cliff coached several Dripping Springs camps in June...about three weeks worth. The kids and I would come up almost every day to visit and "help" with our concession stand. This consisted of our kids eating any concession stand profits. Elijah especially enjoyed the blow pops which revealed its residue on several basketballs.

Preaching
In addition to camps, Cliff spent much of his summer writing sermons. We even were able to have somewhat of a system where he would write pages of notes and I would come help organize his ideas...since organization is my favorite thing. It was a load of fun...very life giving, and we were so thankful for the churches who gave us the opportunity to share Jesus. A few messages were recorded and can be viewed here...

Father's Day
For the life of me, I am having a hard time remembering what we did for Father's Day. I know we got together with family, so maybe someone will remind me! Regardless we had fun and made these fun cards for Cliff and our dads. They were a big hit...and yes, I literally took about thirty shots before this one turned out...



















Elijah's 2nd Birthday
Our little buddy turned two July 1! I can't believe this little guy is so big. We had a water themed outdoor party at the house and called it "the backyard splash." Elijah and his buds splished and splashed with baby pools, slip n slide, sponges, bubbles and a sprinkler. Everyone had a blast! Our little man has so much personality and he still loves to cuddle with his mommy. I am trying to cherish those moments because I know with boys it won't last long.


















The Fourth
For Independence Day we took the trip to Marble Falls to visit Cliff's mom and stepdad. They have the best small town parade in Horsheshoe Bay where we caravan-ed through with their golf cart. The kids loved throwing candy and we ended the street parade to watch the boat parade on the water. The kids also enjoyed crafts, BBQ, a balloon man all provided by Horseshoe Bay.



















Our Fifth Anniversary
Throughout the summer, Cliff and I were able to enjoy a few dates without kids, but our best time was celebrating five years July 12 in Fredricksburg. We went to Cabernet Grille and enjoyed some of the best food I have tasted. Then we walked the downtown Fredricksburg, enjoyed some live music, visited a beautiful Catholic Church and talked for hours. Every year with this man gets better!




















Brenham
We were able to close on our house in Brenham! Thank you Lord and thank you mom (our realtor)! For closing, we were able to visit some much loved friends and catch up. It was bittersweet to see the Brenham chapter of our lives close. Brenham has some of the best people...we will miss them all terribly.

Blanco State Park
We made a few trips to the Blanco river which has become one of our favorite, quick get-a-ways. It is inexpensive and beautiful. The river has perfect holes for swimming as well as the long river you can float down. We even rented a canoe and the whole family piled in. 



















Vacation Bible School
The kids attended two Vacation Bible Schools. This our first time to attend, and I was so excited. Grace was the most excited and the two younger ones went along for the ride. Grace was able to pick up a verse and a lot of new songs. We are still listening to the VBS CD.






















































 
 

Zoo
We have been wanting to visit the Austin Zoo, and we finally made a trip with my dad a few weeks back. It is the perfect zoo for small kids because it does not take the whole day to go through. It also has a train ride. We were all most impressed by the lions which you can get pretty close to!




























Jellystone
Just a week ago, we visited Jellystone in Fredricksburg with the kids. It is a fun spot for the day or to camp, but we just went for the day and enjoyed their kid-friendly pool, arcade games, jumping pad, and brand new facilities. It was a big hit!

Walking
Our little 10 month, Anna Ruth, is starting to take some steps. She so badly wants to keep up with her brother and sister, so I can tell she is determined. Here she is taking her first steps...


Family
We were able to make some wonderful memories with our families as well. Living in Austin has moved us closer to many relatives opening up opportunities for fun dinners and get-togethers. Cliff's dad drove down and visited for a few days taking the boys to Franklin's BBQ and ending the day watching UT Football practice. We were able to make several trips to visit Cliff's mom and stepdad who always helped so much with the kids so we could get away. We met my dad a few times downtown including Zilker, Lucy's fried chicken, and Magnolia Cafe. My mom did move back to North Carolina this summer which was very sad (I loved having her close!), but we were able to enjoy the summer before she left at Deep Eddy and the Austin Children's Museum.

Other Fun Memories

Elijah having a blast at the YMCA pool


Grace supporting LIFE at the Capitol
Celebrating Cliff and Matt's Birthday
Our little athlete climbing in Wimberely
Loving the water at my dad's neighborhood pool                                                                     
                          


Tuesday, March 26, 2013

The Race

So the last couple of months I have not had writer's block. Nor have I planned at the least to quite blogging. I actually have had many ideas (and our little babies) to share online, but haven't figured out how to fit writing into my life...

I know we all have busy lives...and I am not trying to compare but sometimes I feel like I am swimming upstream against my task list. I decided that this blog would not be apart of that, but more of an art to enjoy when I can. So, with that new perspective...my posts might be less frequent but not forgotten or abandoned.

I have had a story on my heart that I have wanted to share. A few weekends ago, my husband signed the whole family up for a 5K race. Let me clarify, he signed me and the baby for the 5K and he was going to run the 10K with our two kids...he is a stud of course. Race day came and I was not excited. I am a college athlete, prepared for every athletic competition, but by no means prepared for this one. I want to be in the front of the line, winning, breathing hard and admired for my athleticism. But, with bad knees and three babies, running wasn't an option for me. As we arrived on race day...which was cold and rainy...I put little bit (Anna, 5 months) in her pouch and brought the stroller and a sour perspective. When I arrived at the start line I could feel the excitement of everyone. There was laughing, music and my attitude began to change. I thought...okay...I know I won't be in the front, but I am still a stud, right? I mean I am carrying a baby and walking the dog while pushing a stroller. Maybe I will just speed past all the walkers and draw admiration for the heavy load I carry.

So the race begun, and I started out strong. I passed several people, and was hauling. I caught up with some friends I knew who were chit chatting through a nice stroll. They began talking to me and I quickly replied and kept going. I mean...I didn't have time for conversation...I still had more people to beat!! I continued on...leaving them behind and passed 20, 40 and then 50 walkers and some runners who had stopped to take a break. At about halfway I met up with my husband. He was a little crippled with a stroller that tires had gone flat and two kids, so he wasn't running at his normal pace. When Grace saw me (our preschooler) she wanted to join me in the race. I was happy to invite her and knew Cliff needed the relief, so she hopped out of the stroller while Elijah and Cliff continued on.

With Grace, Anna and the dog...I was still determined to pick up the pace. As we hit mile three I noticed Grace slowing down a bit...I encouraged her to practice her "running" to keep up, but that ended in a fall. I stopped. I helped her up and held her as she cried. At the same time, people began passing us one by one. We continued on, and then another fall....Grace is crying. And we stop. Again more people pass. At this point, my pursuit of advancing looks dim...very dim.

But in the moment God spoke to me.

He reminded me that I didn't need to "win" or what I saw as "winning", but Grace needed to finish well. And she wouldn't be able to if I didn't stop to help her, teach her, and guide her.

There is always a race. Whether it is the race to be the best "mom" or have the best "career" or "ministry." There is always a race. But the only race that matters is the one God has called us to...to be more like him, and he didn't come to be first, but last. He came to serve not to be served. And motherhood is just that. Constantly putting aside the task at the moment and choosing to help my children and teach them, so they can thrive and grow and be all they can for God.

Grace, Anna, the dog and I finished almost last. It took us a long time, over one hour for a 5K! I was okay with it though. My life was more full helping my babies then finishing alone.